


Silence In The Library

by ngk_is_cool



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Library, Attempt at Humor, Crowley is Bad at Communicating (Good Omens), Fluff, Lost and Found, M/M, Oblivious Aziraphale (Good Omens), aziraphale is a librarian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 22:34:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28981935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ngk_is_cool/pseuds/ngk_is_cool
Summary: Why would someone put cereals in the refund box of a library?
Relationships: Aziraphale & Anathema Device, Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale (Good Omens) & Newton Pulsifer, Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24
Collections: Good Omens Human AUs





	Silence In The Library

**Author's Note:**

> The AU that (allmost) nobody asked for!  
> Aziraphale and newt works in the local library, and keep on discovering things-that-are-not-books in the refund box. who is it from?  
> Many thanks to the real hero, kmbjornstad, who was brave enough to do the beta.

Aziraphale stared at the cereal box, confused. He knew what it was, obviously. It was his favorite kind of cereal, the one he regrettably stopped eating after one too many pointed remarks from his father about that brand being "too good for him." What he didn't understand was the reason for the location of that said box. Why would someone put cereals in the refund box of a library?

Eventually, he took it out, mainly because you can't just leave food in the refund box, can you? It stared at him from his desk, and kept distracting him until Newt came a few hours later and they changed shifts. Newt was only mildly confused with the unexpected cereals, and started to eat the "Flavor of Heaven" without a second thought.

The thing is, that refund box of a local library can be full with surprises, almost like it was bigger on the inside. Sometimes it's a book returned a few years after the original date, or the occasional homework of a student that accidently protruded to a children book. One unforgettable time, he got a phone call, late in the night, to his private home number, from a teacher who forgot the test he wrote for tomorrow's exams between the pages of the truly hideous romantic novel he was reading at the time. But food? That was a first.

Apparently, it wasn't the last time. About a week later, Aziraphale found more food in the refund box, but this time, a package of cookies. Not just any cookies, but a hand-packed package from his favorite delicatessen, Pepper and More. The cookies were only his second best flavor, chocolate chips and black sesame with nuts, and not crunchy cinnamon with cocoa and orange, but this time he didn't hesitate before he started to dig in.

Few days later, he found another Not-Library-Book, but this time it wasn't food, but a vinyl disc from his favorite composer. Then two weeks without anything out of the ordinary, and Aziraphale was starting to forget the whole thing. He tried to tell Crowley, his boyfriend, that something weird was going on, but all he got was a dismissive look and a shrug. 

So, when after about a month of not finding any more surprises in the refund box, he found another one, he didn't bother to tell him. He would probably think it's not a big deal, anyway. Why would anyone be so excited about a YA book, that wasn't even in a very good condition?

But the thing is, it wasn't just any YA book, it was a story about a kid who became a cat, the story his mom read to him every night. It was one of his kindest memories from his childhood (not surprisingly, because the competition in that department wasn't that big), but he never managed to find that book again, and his mother didn't remember, and then it became too late to ask her. He never told anyone about it, so it was a miracle to see the book before his eyes, so many years later.

After that, he started to find things on a more regular basis, and looked forward to Wednesday, which became the regular day for his surprises. He still had no idea who it was from, and with the generous help of Newt, started to make wild assumptions.

Perhaps, he thought ideally, it was that good looking man, who kept coming on his shifts, borrowing mainly philosophy and art books? In fact, he already read all the books that were available in the library, and they had to ask management for an extra budget, just so he could take more books in those subjects.

He tried to strike a conversation with him, a few weeks after the whole thing started. Not that he would ever cheat on Crowley, of course! But he was acting weird lately, keeping something to himself, and there is nothing wrong about being friendly with the regular visitors, right? At least, that was what Aziraphale told himself.

He did a small pep talk to himself before the day he planned to speak with the handsome stranger and find out if he was his secret admirer. The tea was ready, including cookies from Pepper and More, and a carefully chosen music that was playing in the background. Not the vinyl he got, that will be too obvious, but something more up-to-date – greatest hits of 2008, the last before everything became noisy bebop.

When the man approached him, he calmly (well, he tried that angle, but knew he wasn't succeeding from the look he got in response) said: "Lesley, how nice to see you again! We just got new art books, would you like to step into the back room and look at them together?" Now the look changed from surprised to happy, but then settled on regret.

"Going to the back room with you? Yes, I would like that very much, but maybe another time? Got some errands to do. What about next Monday? And can my wife join us? All the books are really for her, I'm just the delivery guy." Aziraphale swallowed, not sure if it was from disappointment that it wasn't his mystery man, and relief from exactly that reason.

He managed to mumble a few words along the line of "yes," and "of course," and "rain check," and smiled politely until he walked away. Well, he thought to himself, that went down like a lead balloon, and swore to forget about the whole thing. But the weird items kept coming, and him and Newt got more and more curious.

He had intended to speak with Crowley again, but they drifted apart in the past months. Crowley was most of the time concentrated on his computer, browsing endlessly in god-forgotten shopping websites, but no package had ever arrived at the house they shared. Aziraphale thought that was weird, but whenever he tried to ask about that mystery, he got the same dismissive look and a shrug.

All this time, he tried, with the generous but not very helpful assistance of Newt, to guess who was the man behind the presents. They were quite sure it was for him, because it always arrived before his shift, and not in the days that Newt was working in the library. But, what if that was a woman, who wasn't aware she was aiming for the wrong department of the singles store?

One immediate suspect was an impressive woman, who kept trying to talk with him, with a knowing look of her face. Aziraphale ignored her attempts to chat with him, but eventually he gave in, mainly because he was too polite to reject her for too long. This time, he didn't make any special arrangements, fearing she will get the wrong impression.

The next time she approached him, he welcomed her with a big smile: "Hello, dearest Anathema! Seems like I have some free time now, if you still want to chat. You mentioned before that you have something important to tell me?"

"Well, I'm glad that you finally made the time to listen to me. Now, this is a very serious matter, so please don't take it lightheartedly." That was not the reaction he embraced himself to receive. Instead of being embarrassed, or flustered, she was calm. Perhaps, he interpreted her intentions incorrectly?

Anathema didn't waste more time before she started in a well-rehearsed monologue: "I've been coming to this library for almost a year now and noticed something that should be changed immediately. The year is 2021, this sort of behavior cannot continue!" Well, thought Aziraphale, at least she is not in love with him.

She marched back and forth while speaking, waving her hands and raising her voice with every sentence. Newt just arrived at the library, but all that excitement was too much for the poor lad, and he muttered something about making tea, before walking very fast (almost running, if he was honest with himself) towards the small kitchen in the back.

By then, Aziraphale was confused, to say the least. "What on earth are you talking about, dear girl?" He tried to cram in a few words, but that got just the opposite effect. 

"I'm no GIRL, mister, I'm a woman! And your library lacks books about feminism, or, for that matter, any book written by women that are not about house cleaning! Haven't you heard about Pat Barker, Sarah Waters or Zadie Smith? Not to mention Connie Willis and Susanna Mary Clarke, for fantasy lovers?"

Yes, she was definitely not looking for his love. He apologized, sincerely, and promised to bring the wrong into just as soon as possible. By the time she calmed down, Newt returned from the kitchen, carrying tray with tea and biscuits (the good ones) and Aziraphale suggested they will sit in the back room, to make a list of all the authors that Anathema thought should be included in the inventory of the library. Newt looked a bit terrified at first but agreed to the task, Aziraphale was very relieved to discover.

That wasn't the outcome he was hoping for, though Aziraphale after the two of them disappeared in the back, but it could have been worse. She could have demanded to computerize the library, he thought with disgust. These are books, they should be categorized in the good, old, proven way of card index. It worked for generations and generations of librarians, there is no need to change the way just because of "technology."

After that suspect was cleared, the whole thing stopped for a few weeks. He missed that a bit, receiving surprises from an anonymous admirer, but started to acknowledge that fact that maybe he will never know the answer. And anyway, with his 30th birthday just around the corner, he started to plan the perfect vacation for him and Crowley.

His boyfriend was acting weird for quite a while now, but the problem grew even bigger in the last few weeks, he thought to himself with despair. After dating for almost three years, he believed he knew his partner well enough, and that he will trust with whatever issue he has, but apparently, that was not the case.

Every time he tried to bring the subject, and plan a vacation together, he got a frozen response that was followed by more browsing on the internet. The whole thing became absurd, honestly. Doesn't Crowley trust that no matter what happens, Aziraphale will be there for him?

So, when later that week he found another surprise in the refund box, this time a simple envelope with a single ticket to Hamlet, performing on the night of his birthday, he didn't even bother to share with Crowley with the information. If his boyfriend doesn't want to spend time with him, he will celebrate with the person who does.

In the following days he was full of excitement, and barely managed to hide it from Crowley. Magically, or sadly, he didn't even notice when his birthday arrived. Aziraphale waited for him to congratulate him, but that hadn't happened all day. Hurt, he went to the theater directly from his work.

There, he discovered that his seat was in a private booth, with a great view, and was all covered with roses. There was even a box of Pepper and More cookies in the seat, this time his favorite. He heard a knock on the door, and when it opened, saw Crowley. He didn’t know who he was looking for, but surely not him.

His boyfriend looked at him, with a sly smile. "Did you really think I will forget your birthday?" 

Aziraphale looked at him and tried to wrap his mind around the shifting reality. "But the ticket was in the refund box, like all the other presents… Hold on, does that mean…" he stammered, as tears started running down his face.

"Of course, it will be you. Who else will give me cereals after finishing them at breakfast, or will remember my favorite book, or..." He made a mental list of all the items he received and realized that every one of them was something they had talked about before. Even the socks with the dolphins, who arrived after they saw a documentary about oceans.

Crowley stepped forward and hugged him, a crooked smile on his face. "Oh, the look on your face that day was glorious, I almost confessed about the whole thing back then, but it would have spoiled the surprise, wouldn't it? But now, my dear, there is something else I want to give you, something that I didn’t dare to put in the refund box". With a gracious move, he brought out from his much too tight trousers a small box, and handed it to Aziraphale.

He backed a bit and stumbled into the chair. The roses were a bit of a pain to sit on, but in that moment, he was willing to sit even on a flaming sword for his love. Crowley kneeled, and said: "My love, there is nothing I want more, than to bring you more presents. Will you accept this one, and be my husband?"

The answer that Aziraphale managed to deliver wasn't the most coherent one, but his boyfriend (no, his spouse) understood non the less, and put the ring on his finger. "And now, my dear, please relax in your seat. The show is about to start, and I wouldn't miss it for the world. Even that I still prefer the funny ones."

**Author's Note:**

> The idea strarted as a meme in one of the GO groups, thanks for the inspiration!  
> Wrote the whole thing in one go, with beta only for grammer. I hope the result will be fun to read, as it was fun to write :)  
> Jennie, by Paul Gallico, is a real a great book. not just for cat lovers!


End file.
